Thursday, April 28, 2005

Cynical Me

She says : He is smart (fullstop).
It means : He is such a geek/nerd

She says : He has a quirky sense of humour
It means : He tells a lot of dirty jokes. I can't bring him anywhere.

She says : He is funny (fullstop).
It means : He is such a clown, falling all over the place.

She says : He is mature (fullstop).
It means : He is boring, and I don't think he will be a good shag. Say, is his head balding?

She says : He is reliable (fullstop).
It means : He is boring, but he is good for driving me around and doing things for me. He was the shoulder I cried on when the guy I had the wildest sex with dumped me. Then I moved on looking for more wild sex.

She says : He has got great personality
It means : He is ugly/fat/poor. Far from hunky. Far. I don't want him to touch me.

She says : He has an interesting personality
It means : What a weirdo. Pray tell why did you unleash him upon my life. Urgh.

She says : He is a persistent man.
It means : Oh God, a stalker.

She says : He is a confident man.
It means : Urgh that domineering, egoistic jerk.

She says : He is a driven man.
It means : Drive far away from me pal

She says : He is too good to be true.
It means : Look, you may think you are great but I think you are butt ugly. And I that was a lousy kiss you slobbering geek.

She says : He knows what he wants.
It means : I know you wanna get laid, but not a chance buddy. Dream on!

She says : I just want to be friends with him.
It means : He is ugly. And poor.

Look, having been around for a while, some people are just suckers for pain, and plain shallow. It is not only men that are superficial. Sometimes it pays to open your eyes.

So for those who can't see pass the surface, your loss.

Postscript : Who doesn't want money, power and looks huh? But when someone asked me if I say the person has great personality and intelligent, do I mean she isn't quite shagable/attractive, my answer is that is not the point. When I say she has great personality, is interesting and intelligent, I mean it :) There is only so much you can get from physical attractiveness. You may say I'm being an idealist. I am, so sue me :P Yeah sure aesthetics are good for the eyes but experience have thought me that's plainly not good enough.


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