My indecisiveness may save me yet.
My rash actions may save me too.

Am not in the best of conditions. But mentally and physically ok to work.
Would have to limit myself to 60 hours week for the next few weeks (can do this if I take a few days off). For obvious reasons. Else I might just crumble, physically.

And I may be off target again if I do not take major drastic steps to rectify my situation.

This calls for Plan E!

Desperation!

In the mean time, exciting times ahead at work. It would make or break my progression for the next 6 months.

It's either I get fast-tracked again or I walk, I think. Thinking hard. I love my job. But love is blind.

At this moment, everything is converging while I am diverging. If that makes sense. Hard questions. Can I compromise? Or should I wait it out before committing? I think the latter makes more sense.

My self-awareness is not helping at all. It is confusing the hell out of me.

Marriage and children should not scare me the way it does. Well, scare may be too strong a word. Ambivalent may be it.

This sounds like a good idea:
1. A ride to Singapore. Meet family and friends
2. Fly to HK
3. Spend time alone
4. Fly back to Singapore.
5. Take a ride home
In the last week of the year.

I don't particularly fancy the year end. Although I have had good ends past couple of years. It's the most emotionally tiring period every year, except for the good years.

This year has been mixed. Lots of good stuff. But there were moments I am not proud of.