Remembering A Friend

It has been two years. In her memory, I'm posting something I wrote which I shared with my friends then.

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I was wishing that it was just a bad dream. That when I wake up everything will be alright. But that is not to be, for I'm obviously awake and in reality now.

You read about all sort of incidents in newspapers and magazines. Never once you would think that it will hit so close to home. Hit so close to the heart. You would never have thought that it will happen to a dear friend...whose dreams are lost forever just like that.

When my handphone rang with Eng Song's name flashing on it at 8.50 p.m., I found it strange as he rarely called. And the tone of his voice trying hard to break slowly to me, I knew something horribly unthinkable had just happened. I broke down. For the first time in many years, I lost control.

It is unimaginable. People who are kind and lead a good life do not get hurt, we were told since we were young and that God will protect them. Where were You, oh the Almighty one? She was the only person I can honestly say has never hurt or harmed anyone, not a single bone of hatred in her. Yet You let her bones break and her flesh bleed.

Dreams shattered. Not of only an individual but for her family...and for those who love her dearly. A few weeks ago, she was debating which car she should buy for her and her family...a car that can fit all five of them. Her mom likes the Kenari but she was thinking about an Iswara as the Kenari looks ugly in her eyes. It was joyful to hear her speak so animatedly as I know it was a tough semester before this juggling work and thesis. No matter how hard it was, she was always determined to make it through, for a better life for her family. Her dreams of a new home is no
more.

The last email from her, she said she would try to answer my phonecalls more often and that she thinks she should try to take a 'slow dance' through life. But now she will never answer our calls again.

May she live in our memories as long as we have memories. As a person without hatred. Full of kindness. Always giving and putting her family and friends ahead. May we live her spirit of enterprise and determination and honesty and innocence. Of strong character and love. Gentle and always with a loving smile that brighten our days.

Lui Meng, rest in peace.

' SLOW DANCE '

Have you ever watched kids
On a merry-go-round?
Or listened to the rain
Slapping on the ground?
Ever followed a butterfly's erratic flight?
Or gazed at the sun into the fading night?

You better slow down.
Don't dance so fast.
Time is short.
The music won't last.

Do you run through each day
On the fly?
When you ask How are you?
Do you hear the reply?

When the day is done
Do you lie in your bed
With the next hundred chores
Running through your head?

You'd better slow down
Don't dance so fast.
Time is short.
The music won't last.

Ever told your child,
We'll do it tomorrow?
And in your haste,
Not see his sorrow?

Ever lost touch,
Let a good friendship die
Cause you never had time
To call and say,"hi"

You'd better slow down.
Don't dance so fast.
Time is short.
The music won't last.
When you run so fast to get somewhere
You miss half the fun of getting there.
When you worry and hurry through your day,
It is like an unopened gift....
Thrown away.

Life is not a race.
Do take it slower
Hear the music
Before the song is over.

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Note : This was written in November 2002. The 'slow dance' she referred to is this forwarded poem (source unknown) I included in the above note.